They said that to make a relationship last, you should not expect too much from your partner. While that could work for some, it could also be a cause for unhappiness. The kind of expectations relationships need must be set by a couple for a healthier relationship.
In fact, Donald Baucom, a psychology professor at the University of North Carolina, revealed that setting expectations is important for long-lasting relationships. After a decade of studying marital situations, he found out that people get what they expect. People who expect less in a relationship tend to be treated poorly while those who expect more are treated well. Thus, you will more likely be in a healthy relationship if you have high expectations and do not settle for less.
8 Expectations You Need To Know For A Healthy Relationship
As mentioned above, setting high expectations is essential so you have a relationship that does not take you for granted. But what are the expectations of a relationship that you need to know? Here are some of them:
1. Being prioritized
When you are important to someone, you should be one of their priorities. Although this does not mean that they should only focus on you as they still have personal matters going on. Being in a relationship should not take you away from your personal lives. But if you’re going through a difficult time, your partner should be there for you to give you comfort. Especially in times when you are struggling a lot, your partner must have the time to attend to your needs as soon as he can.
2. Having good communication
Proper communication is one of the most important aspects of a healthy relationship. It is not all the time that you are lucky enough to be partnered with your soul mate. Some couples have big personality gaps and believe that opposites attract. This is when effective communication is needed the most as this type of couple often has clashing thoughts and ideas that cause arguments. Make sure that your partner is always ready to listen and does not invalidate your feelings and concerns.
3. Being trusted
A healthy relationship means you trust each other. However, fully trusting someone does not happen overnight. Sometimes, it takes weeks, months, or even years to build trust with and from your significant other. No matter how much you love each other, it will still make no sense if you don’t trust them or vice versa. The feeling of security in a relationship contributes to your happiness and fulfillment. You don’t need to be with someone who interrogates you about the smallest things and makes you feel like you can’t be trusted.
4. Having personal space
At the beginning of a relationship, it is common to be with each other all the time since you’re still getting to know each other. Spending time together will make your connection stronger as you experience the good and the bad times with your partner. But this does not mean that you are required to spend every second of the day with them. Being able to have alone time should be respected by your partner. Remember that your whole life does not revolve around one person and that you still need to have time for your personal needs.
5. Deciding on your own
Some people in relationships decide things together – as to how they should be. Being someone’s other half means considering what they think about a particular situation before you both act on it. Asking for your partner’s opinion before finalizing things is another factor of a healthy relationship, but it has its limits. You have to remember that even as a couple, you both still are individuals. You should have the autonomy to decide on things that affect you personally. Some examples may include: what type of clothes you wear, what hobbies you should take, and what to do with your free personal time. Having autonomy lets you continue growing as a person and becoming a better partner.
6. Respecting boundaries
As mentioned above, we are still individuals even if we are in a committed relationship. With that said, each of us has our own interests and preferences on many things. Most importantly, we all have our limits when it comes to compromising for another person. This is where setting healthy boundaries come in and having your partner respect them. For example, you may be the type of person who does not like talking too much about your past. As long as you effectively communicate this boundary with your partner, you have to expect them to respect it and do the same for them.
7. Taking accountability
Everyone is guilty of committing mistakes at some point in their lives. When you are in a relationship and you mess up, the typical resolution is to apologize and promise not to repeat what was done. However, not all those in relationships actually take responsibility for their actions. Some people are too proud to admit their mistakes and some even put the blame on others. Remember that you need a partner who takes accountability for what they have done instead of always letting it slide. You might end up being in a toxic relationship if this behavior does not get resolved immediately.
8. Being affectionate
Being in a relationship automatically means that you can expect your partner to be affectionate with you. This means the usual romantic hugs and kisses but is not limited to that. This could also include serving them breakfast in bed or even driving them from and to work. But keep in mind that every person shows affection differently. No matter what ways they display it, affection in relationships are beneficial as they improve your closeness and appreciation for each other.
Final Thoughts
The truth about expectations in relationships is that they are achievable and flexible depending on your needs. Just remember that the expectations you set must be reasonable and will not do harm to your partner. And as long as you do the same for them, then you can expect a strong relationship with your significant other.
What do you think of the expectations mentioned above? Are they too high or just fair enough? Share this article with a friend who might need some relationship advice.
